The last three years have been the most agonizing, gut-wrenching, traumatic roller coaster of my life due to a toxic, narcissistic abusive relationship. It has been filled with cheating, gaslighting, manipulation, and devaluation-to the point I know longer recognize the person looking back at me in the mirror. I had no idea this type of person existed and I feel like I'm coming out of a cult or a fog and I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm still in cognitive dissonance and shock, even though I've educated myself about this personality. I've left and returned numerous times and I refuse to waste another moment disrespecting myself, so I'm here to help myself recover from this toxic cycle and trauma bond.